Friday, March 23, 2012

Motherhood Is A New Kind Of Gross

I am an organized person. I love baskets, boxes, labels, and jars - anything that allows loose items to all go in a specific place. I have learned, however, that there is a difference between organized and clean. I am not a clean person. Steve can vouch for my weird hatred of showers; I can't explain it, but I hate taking them.

I also have what Whitney affectionately calls my "Monica toilet." In the show Friends, Monica is a psycho clean-freak, but she has one closet that is stuffed with junk. In my house, it's my Master bathroom. That toilet bowl is more often than not ringed in some sort of mildewy awesomensss, and yet, I have my toilet paper arranged in a pyramid on the back of the seat. I have the magazine rack organized by date, but I don't ever let people actually in the bathroom. I know; it's weird.

People like to tell expectant mothers how icky newborns can be, but in my limited experience, newborns have nothing on toddlers. Toddlers are mobile. Oh, and they can throw things, so the likelihood that they can cause some sort of mess grows exponentially with their ability to spread that mess.

Between having two toddlers in the house and not being particularly clean myself, my house has suffered some damage this last past week. It finally got some cleaning love on Friday, but I had to take some pictures first. I don't know if it will look bad from pictures, but you'll just have to trust me...it was gross.

Being almost 9 months pregnant means I can't bend over very easily; or maybe it's just that I don't want to bend over. Either excuse seems perfectly legitimate to me. This is what my kitchen floor looked like all week long...an apple core that Bella left there, a Snickers wrapper, a piece of junk mail, and the wax wrapper from Babybel cheese. I didn't have the guts to take a picture of what it looks like under Bella's little table.

Okay, I know dirty dishes in the sink are no big deal, but my favorite thing about this picture is the trashcan filled with ashes from the fireplace. I was pretty proud of myself for actually cleaning out the fireplace since it's warmer weather now, but I just never followed through and ended up leaving the trashcan on the sink. Oh, and the flower vase with dirty water and dead leaves. Super-pretty! I definitely need to do some hardcore cleaning before we have this baby at home!

3 comments:

The Windhams said...

this is hilarious. i remember being where you are. Btw, in the middle of typing this comment, I saw beckett pick something up off of the floor and try to put it in his mouth (I vacumm daily since he is crawling). I went to get it out of his hand...it was a tiny piece of poop...Maddox is potty training and it must have been from his accident earlier today. I am mortified and can't believe I am telling you. I thought it might make you feel better. Please don't judge me. I am actually very clean.

Wires Family said...

Janna, I love it! I think my grossest moment so far has been when Bella ate a dead bug off the floor and then puked it back up. So nasty!

Ashleigh said...

ha ha ha to both of you:) Molly eats a lot in her "tower" (a hand-me-down learning tower) at the counter and we frequently let all her spills and drops harden through the week--Ryan and I wait for the other one to clean it up. Hello-it would be way easier to clean as we go than to scrub and scour once it's all hardened...whatever.